An interrupted vacation, with a happy ending.

I was on a hunting trip in Tennessee
in the woods, doing good happy and carefree
but things went sideways back at the old homestead
my wife called on the mobile phone and this is what she said

Stop what you’re doing, get your ass moving, this ain’t no false alarm
there’s all kind of trouble brewing down on the farm

The dog got bit by a rattlesnake, the cat has got the heaves
cows got out of the pasture they’re eating loco weed
Skunk crawled underneath the porch, and stunk the place to hell
the youngest child is missing he may be down the well

Stop what you’re doing, get your ass moving, this ain’t no false alarm
there’s all kind of trouble brewing down on the farm

Storm blew in the day you left, the crick washed out the bridge
it’s a hundred year flood, a yard full of mud and gators in the ditch
Some men from the government been tramping through the hills
They never found the cash crop but they’re busting up the still

Stop what you’re doing, get your ass moving, this ain’t no false alarm
there’s all kind of trouble brewing down on the farm

When that phone started ringing on that ridge in Tennessee
I could have ignored it very easily
I could have claimed no coverage or a worn out battery…
But I didn’t …

I packed up the gun I left on the run I got back home by night
I worked through the darkness to try to set things right
I found the kid, I fixed the fence, and I chased away those men
I shot a hole in my mobile phone so I never have to hear this again…

Stop what you’re doing, get your ass moving, this ain’t no false alarm
there’s all kind of trouble brewing
all kind of trouble brewing
all kind of trouble brewing down on the farm